I met Violin on a dating site where I was almost 3 years old. There were many beautiful girls and I corresponded with many, even from other countries. It was just a chat - I had no special feelings or emotions for a particular girl. I worked in a luxury massage parlor so I knew how to appreciate beauty. This was an important point for me, but I also looked at her success, views and status. I made good money and did not want to be a sponsor for my wife. She also had to work in a decent job.
My requests were great and this was the reason for my unsuccessful communication. I thought that many girls have low status and are just looking for a rich guy. I thought so for a long time but then I met Violin. She lived in another country but was born in Poland. She moved to another country because she found a guy on a dating site. They had a good relationship and moved to the wedding. Then they had quarrels and problems, although she was already pregnant. He did not see this causally continue the relationship and they broke up. She moved to her friend because she already had a job there. The friend lived alone in a large house and it was convenient for them. Before giving birth, Violin worked because she didn’t want to go to her sick mother’s hometown without work, without money and with a child.
She stayed there and gave birth to a daughter. She is well done because she was able to draw up a benefit from the state and received money from companies as maternity leave. It was normal money, so she had no problems with finances and did not want to find a rich husband. She was just looking for love and a father for her child. Violin lived with her mother and did not see her own father so she wanted a better life and a normal family for her daughter. I understood that this girl had many difficulties, but she was positive and believed that she would find the ideal partner. I respected her strong character but the children were taboo for me. I didn’t want children and I definitely didn’t want to raise someone else’s child.
We just talked and I told her a similar story to my sister. She also found a guy and he left her with a small child. Such stories are scary, but such girls must believe in good things. I liked this girl and her life position. She was pretty but far from my feminine ideal. But here I liked our conversation. It was a spiritual contact - maybe it was the most important thing for me. I was looking for a beauty but found "my girlfriend". The child embarrassed me a little, but I decided to go to her place to get acquainted in person.
My trip was a success. I took work with a laptop and went there for 2 weeks. We met and walked with her child. I liked this cute girl. She fascinated me with her childhood innocence, curiosity and cleanliness. I did not like children but her child was charming. I liked the role of dad and husband. We walked, went to cafes and children's centers. I was not sorry for the money for her and her daughter. I thought it was the right expense to make them happy. I spent on my entertainment and I felt sorry for the money, but here I was calm. Her daughter enjoyed any toy, even ice cream. And I was pleased with this. Violin did not want a relationship then that she saw me as a friend. And that was enough for me. I did not want to change my life and she was not ready to move again.
I returned home and we are still chatting. She still did not find a good guy and I found a girl for the next spicy romance. I do not want a serious relationship and responsibility but that girl showed that the partner can be a friend as well. It has changed my views, but I'm still not ready for responsibility. I am sorry for the right and decent girls who are looking for a husband on dating sites but then get disappointed. Maybe she can build a family because I sincerely want happiness for her. I like my love adventures and so far I'm not ready to change my life.
I am grateful to Violin that she changed my attitude towards children. Now I spend more time with my nephew to get the experience I need. Perhaps it will be useful for me in the future. I changed jobs and became more serious to achieve my goals. But I'm not ready to build a family yet. But I understand that I'm already close to this.